Why do these insensitive people keep asking me “why are you single?” There is so much more to me than being single, and frankly, it's no one’s business. I mean really, these people are being rude, and I don’t think they deserve a polite answer. How should I handle this?
A Facebook friend posted this question. Having been asked this question several times myself, I certainly understood my friend's frustration. This is a question that many people who are waiting on God for their mate are asked. Yes, it does get old, but we can change the way we receive it. For instance, they may be asking because they see you as a wonderful and loving person who has a lot to offer a potential partner. So, they genuinely have a hard time understanding how someone so wonderful can be single. Most people don't mean any harm, so take it as a compliment.
It could also be because of the way of the world today. Many singles find it hard to hold out, stand and wait. They get tired of praying and waiting, waiting, and praying, so they give in to the pressure and end up getting involved in bad relationships. For me, I don't think it is a good idea to date anyone you wouldn’t marry. Why risk getting involved or falling in love with someone who isn’t marriage material? I don’t believe in serial dating or putting yourself in tempting situations.
Loneliness is an emotion that can cause a lot of trouble it is not put in check. A person dwelling on loneliness could begin to believe the lie that God is withholding something from them; that their life is less than somehow. Although some people do see singleness, especially for a long period as strange, there is nothing wrong with being single if this is what you desire.
In Genesis 2:18 “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” I love encouraging and sharing myself with others, so I look forward to sharing myself with my mate. I want to share life’s joys and pains with him. I want him to be there to comfort and care for me like a husband should. So, I get how irritating it can be when someone throws it in your face that you are still alone.
You also can't discount that when people ask why you are still single God could be trying to get your attention. Before you throw the question out, go to your Father and talk to Him. Never throw the baby out with the bathwater is something the old folks used to say. In my book "I Don't Believe in Fairytales" I talk about how God showed me that I had strongholds (mindsets) that was keeping me from receiving God's best in this area. I listened to Him and released. I believe even more so now that I am prepared and ready for this wonderful, not perfect, but godly man who God has prepared me for. He is so close I can feel him. I could meet him today. And that's not a fairytale. That's faith!
You ever heard the saying, “God is never late, or early, He's always right on time, right?” He is a God of order, structure, and He is specific when He does something. Every blessing God gives is aligned with His purpose and our destiny. So, in the meantime, talk to Him, grab a copy of the book, ready and study it with the Holy Spirit and let God continue your preparation for your mate.